Friday Caption Fun, Round 81

Halo 3 ScreenshotI don’t know about you but it’s been one helluva week and I’m completely and utterly exhausted. I feel like a zombie, which is actually pretty appropriate considering this weekend’s double experience playlist of choice is Living Dead. You’re more than welcome to your fair share of brains but stick around and caption a bit before heading out, won’t you? We can recap last week’s responses and then check out a brand new Halo 3 screenshot. Fun fun!

  • “Caboose is trying desperately to come up with nice Valentine for Sheila.” (ZZoMBiE13)
  • “I swear I was next to the Chief in the urinals and it’s that big.” (Don A K Bab)
  • “Hey baby, you give me a heart-on.” (Das Kalk)
  • “The two-handed method is always the most efficient if you fart during your date.” (XMixMasterX)
  • “Heartdoken!” (The Flying Spartan)
  • “For your Valentine’s Weekend forecast, looks like we have a heart-shaped snowstorm moving in from the west. Perfect snuggling weather!” (SkelBrute)
  • “Valentine’s Tree: it’s like Christmas, only with a heart instead of a star and loneliness instead of presents.” (Mike)
  • “The blue Spartan felt that the only way he could truly confess his love and adoration was by doing the robot. It worked.” (Zerowind117)

Anybody unimpressed by the robot is clearly somebody not worthy having, and you can quote me on that! Unfortunately the person riding shotgun in this Warthog can’t do the robot though which automatically puts him at a disadvantage. I’m pretty sure more than that comes into play but ultimately that’s your determination. Figure out what’s going on in this rather odd screenshot then let me know in the form of a witty caption!

Halo 3 Screenshot
Author: Unknown

95 Responses to Friday Caption Fun, Round 81

  1. PeterSimp says:

    The driver looked in the rear view mirror and gasped as he saw the headless horseman chasing them, he wants it back!

    Calm down! Don’t lose your head!

    Hey! These seats are comfy!

    Jeff was definitely the navigator, he could do little else

    Damn! I knew we’d forgotten something!

    A Koala in Spartan Armour was definetly a shock, hiding in the seat was the first thing that came to mind

    • Jim says:

      I’m sure the transplant will take Sgt. Johnson, Just have to make it thru this New Mombasa traffic!

    • PeterSimp says:

      “Look, you stupid bastard, you’ve got no arms left.” “Yes, I have.” “Look!” “It’s just a flesh wound.”

      • InventiveArgument says:

        Dat Head.

        (Look at the black guy’s face)

  2. Arby says:

    Calling shotgun lasts a lifetime.

    George was determined to save Steve, a bit too determined.

    The Chief was struggling to find the final skull, in an act of rage he tore off a bystander’s head. When he still had not unlocked the achievement he angrily tossed it aside.

  3. WARNING: Warthog is not codpiece-proof.

    • WARNING: Contact with hazardous codpieces may cause detachment of head from shock.

  4. Morio kun says:


    • OwlAssassin says:

      I’m sorry, Dave. I’m afraid I can’t do that.

      • Remember Reach says:

        F.KING WIN!

  5. Pete Cooper says:

    “Bungie, approaching their Halo-based DecapAttack reboot, decided to take the ‘horrors of war’ angle.”

  6. Don A K Bab says:

    The designated driver takes his friend home, you shouldn’t be legless behind the wheel. Looking on the bright side though at least he’s not shit faced.

  7. dragnew says:

    “That’s not what I expected when I asked for a little head”

    • JLay says:

      Sweet. I was quoted from a previous Friday Caption winner! Gotta love a classic.

  8. Grif says:

    Lopez where is your helmet?!?

    • Nuclear Pi says:

      Curses! – I wanted to do that one.
      Ah well, you beat me to it fair and square…

  9. xxxJL AUDIOxxx says:

    Free mustache rides!

  10. Radius says:

    “Following several lawsuits, the UNSC has taken equal oportunity employment to a whole new level.”

  11. porge says:

    That must’ve been one crazy party last night…

  12. Cleansing Aura says:

    “It’s just a flesh wound”

    “Dave honourably saved the day by biting the elites’ legs off”

    “Hey Dave – how about a game of head-ball… i mean football?”

    • JLay says:

      Monty Python quote is pure win

  13. Someone says:

    Ever wondered how Kit from Knight Rider really works?

    • xxxJL AUDIOxxx says:


  14. Gagazet says:

    Someone understood “Gimme head!” teribble wrong

  15. xLAS3RP01NT3Rx says:

    Andy got an upgrade.

  16. Malechei says:

    Apparently, the UNSC has a very different definition of the term “road head”.

    • Das Kalk says:


  17. ReverendTiki says:

    “You want anything from McDonald’s?”
    “Just take me to the hospital!”

  18. HSAR says:

    “So, have you got a plan? If you do, I’m all ears.”
    “Shut up, you’re all head.”

  19. OwlAssassin says:

    “Serves you right for trying to get a closer look at Miranda’s camel-”
    “Just shut up and drive.”

  20. Dragonv2.0 says:

    looks like sarge finaly found lopez

  21. t0rm3n7 says:

    Even though the sarge is just a head, he’ll still kick your ass.

  22. liphttam1 says:

    “I don’t know what’s worse, that my body got disintegrated by that scarab blast or that theres a beetle on my beard and the only way I can get rid of it is by eating it.”

  23. Shotgun!
    Shotg-FUCK *pulls out gun*

  24. Monkey_lord says:

    Oh…my…god, Andy your ALIVE!

    Sir, your body is trying to catch up, should I pull over?

  25. Mizzy says:

    “You were supposed to get Cpt. Keyes in here, not Johnson!”

  26. JLay says:

    What do you mean this doesn’t qualify for the carpool lane, officer?!?
    UNSC supersoldier fail = Master Sargeant John the Baptist 117
    Private Avery Johnson didn’t take $h1t from anyone, even his Drill Sargeant

    • pwkwsfi says:

      nice. You beat me to the carpool joke, then upped it with the head on the silver platter reference.

  27. PsycoJoe says:

    “Damn you, Corporal Tom Tom. I’m lost.”

  28. Mr Viper says:

    “Stop panicking, keep your head on Marine- Oh God damn it.”

  29. Das Kalk says:

    (this is dependant on the fact that you realize that that marine head is actually Marcus Lehto, the lead on Halo: Reach)

    “Marcus was working so hard during crunch, he actually lost his head”

  30. Surrender says:

    And THAT is why I always buckle up.

  31. Cailus says:

    Ya see, THAT’S how tough Marines are. Cut their heads off, and they’ll just keep on coming!

  32. Oddsock says:

    “Oh my God, what the hell is that chasing us?!”
    “What? I don’t see anything. By the way, you got some dirt on your glovebox.”

  33. Techchild says:

    Do you have an aspirin?

    When I said I should be ahead of you, this is not what I had in mind….

    Well your the brains here, which way now?

    Stop bullying him. He’s ‘armless!!

  34. ComaToast says:

    “Sarge said that if I had any trouble from you I should… *erhem* *deeper voice* Get in the Warthog, and crush your head like a tomato can.”

  35. Hyokin says:

    O’Malley: Mwhahaha! Evil driving!
    Lopez: Usted conduce peor que yo. Y yo no tengo un torso.
    O’malley: Oh shut up.

  36. Seenoht says:

    Ah, lots of headroom…

  37. Driver: So…about that “Unwritten Rule of the Road”…

  38. Mike says:

    seeing that the covenant already destroyed the zoo, the mafia had to find a replacement for putting horse heads in peoples beds

  39. Jim says:

    O crap the Zombies have found and they want Braaains!

  40. Remember Reach says:

    Another example of the little head navigating for the big head.

  41. Crunchbitenuva says:

    I expected you to lose your head after that turn, not the other way around….

  42. retinence says:

    Lopez used the “Reverse Fossilization Machine”, invented by Professor Hubert J. Farnsworth, in the hopes of getting his body back. He didn’t read the fine print…

  43. Gagazet says:

    The tattoo “—-cut here—-” on my neack wasn’t meant to be taken by heart!

  44. “I told you to quit while you were a head”

    yeah i know, cornest joke ever…

  45. QuackJAG says:

    “What? You can’t blame a brother wanting head.”

  46. Rakolai says:

    “Wait, Halo 3 Legendary Edition is supposed to come with a SPARTAN head?!”

  47. Snotwoogle says:

    Beware: danger ahead. A head. Get it? Bah I’m wasted.

  48. Celsius070 says:

    You will be my best friend forever George.

  49. NartFOpc says:


    HE was a burnt out cop with nothing to lose.
    HE was just a head.

    Together, they’ll have to get a new perspective on the world of crime!

    Samuel L. Jackson and Jim Carrey star in: Getting Ahead

    • OwlAssassin says:

      Anything with L. Jackson will be awesome

  50. General Vagueness says:

    “You eyeballin’ me, soldier? Watch the road!”

  51. TAS9303 says:

    Don’t worry Wilson! We will make it to shore!

    • Begocer says:

      And what was he fashioned out of? An oddball? That giant soccer ball from Halo 2? A crumpled up Cod-peice? (Ouch)

  52. Lopez without his helmet

  53. Begocer says:

    That squeaking you hear when you jump into the ‘Hog isn’t the new leather of the seat…it’s someones face grinding across your ass plate. Eh dunno I drew a blank 56 miles long on this one…maybe a revamp or something in the future…maybe something will come to me in a message from God…

  54. halcylon says:

    DUDE… calm down. I’ll get you to the hospital… don’t lose your hea….d over….. it…


    Too soon?

  55. Divine Plan says:

    ‘And so I says to the missus “It wasn’t my fault! Stop trying to bite my head off!”…Oh…sorry Bill”

  56. Divine Plan says:

    ‘Oh, there you are Greg. So, are my keys down there or what?’

  57. cardo8 says:

    Denzel Washington stars in Training Day 2: Handicap-in-dat-ass.

  58. SK CRISIS says:

    Just hang in there Chuck! There’s got to be a hospital around here somewhere!

  59. Head Right!


    there’s more then one way to get aHEAD in this game!!

  60. J23 says:

    “Now now, everyone here just needs to keep their head, we’ll be just fin-…oh…sorry, Bob, didn’t mean to put it like that..”

    “Damn it, the one time Mombasa is full of traffic….*grumbles*.”

    “I’m sorry I took you out of your jar, but we don’t have time to look for it now, Sarge!”


    • J23 says:

      One more: “I thought Ling Ling was supposed to be dog..wait..oh shi-…”

  61. Begocer says:

    So you said you left your jar where? 3rd and Main? Ah, damnit we just passed it! You gotta tell me more man!

    Dunno what its really called…HeadJar? Eh whuddeva…

  62. Personsen says:

    Good thing you quit while you were ahead!

  63. Personsen says:

    “Its just a flesh-wound!!”

  64. liphttam1 says:

    On the battlefield, you want to try not to lose your head. In his case, he lost his body.

  65. Ny Hitman 0401 says:

    Command had budget cuts…again…and this time, it looks like they took Lopez’s Helmet.

  66. The Flying Spartan says:

    Let’s see…fourteen pennies, a spring, half a roll of Smarties, a box of grid squares, the keys to the drop zone, some Bazooka Joe, and fifteen issues of Smart AI Monthly.

    Keep pushing, Fred, keep pushing! I almost got the engine started!

  67. ZZoMBiE13 says:

    “I’m squishing your head!”

    • pwkwsfi says:

      Kids in the Hall?

  68. Babbott says:

    You are more man than me Headless Ponch…

  69. L337MA573R says:

    What some people don’t seem to realize these days is that by giving something to another person, you don’t have it anymore. Case in point: Head.

  70. The warthog new feature, great for those “special” needs. (By the look on his face it might be a bit rough).

    • Heading out to teabag practice.

  71. pwkwsfi says:

    Invisible Ass

    • pwkwsfi says:

      Yabba dabba doo! (with 40″ rims)

  72. ProScreenlooker says:

    What happens when you don’t get out for a spartan who wants shotgun

    Their was a slight glitch involving the adjustable seats in the Halo Reach warthog

  73. xxxJL AUDIOxxx says:

    Sarge did not find the “Deliverance” quotes funny on this day…”He got a real pretty mouth ain’t he? “

  74. SHAGGYDEATH says:

    When they said they were gonna make those flying orbs more human like they were not kidding!

  75. the blue shoe says:

    Road head.

  76. Spade says:

    Don’t worry Sarge, we’ll get you to the medics and get you patched up in no time.

  77. Spade says:

    You ain’t got no legs Lt. Dan.

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