Friday Caption Fun, Round 80

Halo 3 ScreenshotWhen I saw Team Control was the weekend’s double EXP playlist of choice, I was puzzled by its lack of romantic relevance. Then I realized it was the perfect analogy for a relationship, the constant struggle of taking control and attempting to hold your ground. I see what you did there Bungie! Whether you’re playing Team Control in real life or on Halo, right now it’s time for our weekly customary captioning. Up first is recapping last week’s responses, then we’ll look at a new Valentine-themed screenshot!

  • “There wasn’t any headlight fluid and elbow grease, but there was a sale on flags at the store, 2 for 1.” (HellCat)
  • “After dual wielding came to be in Halo 2, Bungie had to up things a notch for Halo 3.” (Gin)
  • “Your mom likes Halo just like she likes her sex, two poles in her face at once!” (xxxJL AUDIOxxx)
  • “Red proves once again why semaphore is a lost art circa-2552.” (Pete Cooper)
  • “So that’s why those CTF games against MLG generals always seem to go so fast!” (JLay)
  • “I don’t care what the download code said. My Special Edition flag doesn’t really look any better than the normal flag.” (ZZoMBiE13)
  • “Someone tell this guy we’re playin’ Territories, not CTF.” (hongoasdf)
  • “When Steve failed to find any Spartan Lasers, he was determined not to let his talents go to waste.” (L337MA573R)


I always knew Steve could fire two lasers simultaneously, but apparently the list of things he can dual wield is longer than I initially thought. Could he handle two of what this next Spartan is showing off though? That is debatable, but what isn’t debatable is that this lovey-dovey screenshot needs a caption. I happen to think you’re the perfect person for the job so come up with a witty quip and leave it in a comment please!

Halo 3 Screenshot
Author: Jamasia

55 Responses to Friday Caption Fun, Round 80

  1. OwlAsssassin says:

    Love the pink mist

  2. You must be at least this tall to ride Bue’s Tunnel of Love.

    • xxxJL AUDIOxxx says:

      Or to suck Raaaaaandy’s D*#@! (that will only be funny if you youtube Raaaaaandy – expressions)

  3. Don A K Bab says:

    I swear I was next to the Chief in the urinals and it’s that big.

  4. Ben Of Bodom UK says:

    I love you thiiiiiiiis much!

  5. liphttam1 says:

    Aww didn’t make the cut, Oh well. Try again this week!

    In an attempt to please bs angel; Masterchief disguised a penis as a valentines heart.

    (The pink mist comes from bottom left and extends to reach the heart making a penis shape)

  6. Arby says:

    Slow dancing has no place in Halo 3. Romeo learnt that the hard way as Juliet was hit by a spartan laser and vaporised.

    • Arby says:

      ‘Aww! That toxic gas cloud is in the shape of a love heart –cough–splutter–‘

  7. “It’s done! Finally, I will be able to be with the one I lov-” *ahem* “I got some bad news for you…”

  8. xxxJL AUDIOxxx says:

    smack that, all on the floor,
    smack that, give me some more,
    smack that, ’till you get sore
    smack that, oooh.

    He’s clearly singing and dancing to a classic!

  9. *hugs*

  10. Gagazet says:

    Angel likes her love just as big as this!

  11. The blue team shows the real meaning behind valentines day, “teabag day”

    (looking at the love heart upside down it looks like a scrotum)

  12. FinAeros says:

    “Donut seemed fond of Blue Team’s new ‘Secret Weapon.'”

    Or

    “Even Spartans understand that Hunters are Love.”

  13. SHAGGYDEATH says:

    They said you did not have heart so I painted you one.

  14. IcyTreats says:

    “Yeaaaaah son, this is what I was doing to your mom last night!”

    ‘Ride ’em, cowboy.’

  15. Visitor at home says:

    This is the longest Tunnel of Love I’ve ever been in!

  16. JLay says:

    Some spartans are red,
    Some spartans are blue,
    But they all do agree,
    Angel – we love what you do!
    Happy Valentine’s Day!

    p.s. – Thank you Angel for 3 straight weeks of Friday Caption fame <3

    • bs angel says:

      Aaawww, … if that isn’t the sweetest thing! <3

  17. SkelBrute says:

    For your Valentine’s Weekend forecast, looks like we have a heart shaped snowstorm moving in from the west. Perfect snuggling weather!

  18. Grif says:

    I may not be able to give you my heart, but I can give you my blood shaped like a heart.

  19. Hun… hun… honey… can i put my arms down now? HONEY!

  20. Monkey_lord says:

    This is the Halo version of Biotic powers.

    Blue show his love for his partner by painting a heart with the blood of his enemies

  21. Hyokin says:

    …Tampons!

  22. “I’m gonna show my valentine this heart I made for her and she’s gonna want me to slap her ass and play some Clarence Carter… ’cause I be Stroke’n!!!”

    It’s really not Valentines Day without some Stroke’n! :)

    • bs angel says:

      I stroke it to the east, I stroke it to the west, I stroke it to the woman that I love the best, I be strokin’!

  23. Roaven says:

    Blue would find the heart much nicer if he wasn’t dieing of blood loss.

  24. Mike says:

    Valentines Tree = its like christmas, only with a heart instead of a star and loneliness instead of presents

  25. VoltRabbit says:

    Next Ill do a bicycle…

  26. soulofaqua says:

    It’s cute untill you find out that is, in actuality period blood.

  27. Cardo says:

    I once caught a fish that was thiiis biiig.

  28. tobias grey says:

    Blue finally found the long sought after heart of Halo. Now he could kill it and stop its tyrannical takeover of lesser WMDS across the galaxy.

  29. XMixMasterX says:

    The two-handed method is always the most efficient if you fart during your date.

  30. Roses are Red
    Violets are Blue
    The heart is pink
    I threw it up just for you!

  31. The Flying Spartan says:

    Heartdoken!

  32. ZZoMBiE13 says:

    “Special” Spartan plays with fingerpaints while the rest of the team goes to war with the Red Team.

    —————————————————–

    Caboose is trying desperately to come up with nice Valentine for Shiela.

  33. Das Kalk says:

    “hey baby, you give me a heart-on”

  34. Cailus says:

    Blue 3’s attempts to display his affections for Red Team were very much appreciated, judging by the fusillade of bullets ten seconds later.

    Halo: Shooting aliens, exploring massive extragalactic installations and making bad Valentine cards since 2001.

    It’s a rare and special occasion when a Spartan makes art that doesn’t include flying corpses.

    There’s nothing that quite says “I love you” than an amorphous red blob.

  35. ComaToast says:

    When love is not Halo, it is not love. :D

  36. EliteXDeath says:

    I <3 You All.

  37. DethPwn says:

    And they say that Blue’s heart grew three sizes that day…

  38. pwkwsfi says:

    oh look, Bungie changed the map for the iPad announcement!

  39. L337MA573R says:

    “I painted you a heart. With the blood of your ex-boyfriend.”

  40. porge says:

    “Good! The heart distracted you! I can finally do the robot in peace”

    Best I’ve got, seems like eveyrthings been said already…

  41. Zerowind117 says:

    The blue Spartan felt that the only way he could truely confess his love and adoration was by doing the robot. It worked.

  42. J23 says:

    “No! Move it over here, dammit, she’s never going to see it over there…you suck at making hearts! I should’ve just made a card…”

  43. General Vagueness says:

    Spartans aren’t just killing machines, they’re multi-talented, and quite capable of love. This one went out on a limb to sell his idea: heart-shaped Christas tree toppers. Unfortunately he forgot needler dust is very bad for people who don’t have an advanced air filtration system, and wound up feeling quite blue.

    yes, that’s the best I’ve got

  44. Ny Hitman 0401 says:

    Little did Jimmy know, that a heat THAT big, isn’t good at all.

  45. Techchild says:

    Our love for BS Angel extends so far, we were able to make balloons like this well( though with innappropriate materials!!).

  46. Its Fun Time says:

    This only reminds me of the RvB Halo 3 Beta PSA, wherein Tucker says, “My gun is firing kechup!”

    That is all.

  47. Waffle Deluxe says:

    Who left menstrual stains on the now bloody wall?

  48. InventiveArgument says:

    Although blue was slightly surprised at the fact that he was three times as tall as the tree, he soon forgot this when a care bear shot him in the face with it’s love ray and he went off to prance in the fields with Benjamin Franklin, Coco the nutty monkey, and Bob the T-rex. Kids, don’t buy acid from red team.

  49. Panncakez says:

    Planeteers, assemble! Earth! Fire! Wind! Water!
    …Heart?

  50. The Real Dr Nog says:

    i wanna bone you on xbox li-ive

    • bs angel says:

      WIN!

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