Friday Caption Fun, Round 78

Halo 3 ScreenshotLast week we took a brief break from our normal pre-weekend festivities and messed around with Halo-themed motivational posters instead. It was quite entertaining but not everybody likes it when I change things up (waves at Crazy A 64!) so this week we resume our regular Friday programming. We have captioning on the agenda, but first we have to recap the rather witty responses from the previous screenshot of course.

  • “Inspired by Avatar, the Sangheili attempted his own bonding ritual.” (Arby)
  • “Although glad to be back as an adversary in Halo: Reach, Mr. Ascetic ultimately drew the short straw when it came time to visit the vehicle depot.” (Absolute Edge)
  • “After seeing the UNSC’s seagull turret, the Covenant answered back with sniper pterodactyls!” (JLay)
  • “FALCOR!!!!” (mendicantbias00)
  • “Players the world over rushed to get their clip for Anoj’s next Top 10 video: Top 10 Best Sniper Ricochet No-Scopes while riding a bird.” (NartFOpc)
  • “What? They were all out of speeder bikes.” (The Flying Spartan)
  • “They see me flyin’, they hatin’. With Banshees they tryin’ to catch me flyin’ birdies! Tryin’ to catch me flyin’ birdies! Tryin to catch me flyin’ birdies!” (soulofaqua)

If you managed to read the last quote without singing the appropriate ditty, I must insist you go back and do it the correct way. It’s ok, we’ll wait. All done? Then it’s time to try our collective hand at captioning a brand new Halo 3 screenshot. This image is every bit as unique as the last one, just in a completely different way so I now leave you with the task of coming up with an entertaining and relevant quip. Off you go!

Halo 3 Screenshot
Author: Unknown

99 Responses to Friday Caption Fun, Round 78

  1. rollo 93 says:

    See, I do have eyes in the back of my head.

  2. HellCat says:

    No scope to a new level: No look

    • HellCat says:

      Halo on steroids! Massively advanced reflexes!

    • Nuclear Pi says:

      “Heeeeeeee Got aaaaaaaaa No-Look”

      • plazmamufin says:

        Mr. Nuclear Pi I believe you win.

        • HellCat says:

          he just edited mine

      • Marksman says:

        …And I just go the reference.

  3. Arby says:

    Steve had trouble differentiating Sex and Halo and as such reverted to his old bedroom tactic of just firing in random directions in hopes of hitting the right spot. Needless to say, it worked.

  4. Glasses Guy says:

    Breaking your mic to stop hearing noobs -$20. Showing them up and hearing them whine on your speaker, priceless.

  5. Cleansing Aura says:

    Dammit woman – I told you not to sneak up on me like that!

  6. BUfels says:

    I AM a beast.

  7. OwlAsssassin says:

    To whom it may concern. I regret to inform you, with all formalities and sincerities, you have failed at sneaking. Your attempt at an assassination has come to an unfortunate end. In all connotations of the word, you have been PWNED.
    Yours sincerely,
    Owl Assassin

  8. Nuclear Pi says:

    Angel’s bad day.

  9. Only if he was that good in bed…

  10. JLay says:

    Auto-aim? Why I’ve never heard of such a thing, sir!


    Red vs. Blue new season preview – the ghost of Annie Oakley haunts the Pit.

  11. Raptorian says:

    Spiderman finally answers his age-old question; how do I shot web?

  12. Schoony says:

    Step Four: squeeze trigger…where is the trigger? Oh, there it is!

  13. MGH1138 says:

    “Hey guys, I was watching Army of Darkness and Bruce Campbell puts his shottie up on his shoulder like this and”… BAMMM…”he kill a zomb..HOLY CRAP! I’m as cool as Ash!”

  14. “I didn’t know Cheney played Halo…”

    Ugh, I know it’s pretty awful but I couldn’t come up with anything else. Commence the thumbing of the downward direction.

    • MGH1138 says:

      I thought it was good. Maybe we have similarly awful sense of humors…

  15. E X Z A says:

    “Seems I have a bullet lodged in here. Let me blow it out.”

  16. soulofaqua says:

    What you don’t see is that Steve is behind that yellow wall making the actual shot.

    • Marksman says:


  17. Monkey_lord says:

    Here we see the adaptation of the GRAW guncam in halo form.

    Now where is the safety on this thing?

    Wait the blue guy said there is more characters on this rifle, I don’t see anything.

    • Monkey_lord says:

      Irony: The Red soldier used a weapon that the Blue develop the kill the reds. Funny: What does this button do?

  18. SHAGGYDEATH says:

    OK point, aim and fire! WTF ! Nothing happened?!

  19. NartFOpc says:

    No I didn’t accidentally shoot him when I sneezed, I’m just really really good.

    • Captain Spark says:

      If anyone could do that, it would be you Nart :)

  20. Anton P. Nym says:

    “Sarge, my gun’s jammed!”


    Annie-043 was a good shot but a bit of a showoff.

    — Steve

  21. Das Kalk says:

    edgar allan pwned!

  22. Oddsock says:

    AH! A BAT! GET IT! GET IT!!!

    Seriously, what I see in this is Red screaming and running away from Blue, firing wildly.

  23. ThatGeek says:

    $100 says you will NEVER manage that again.

  24. ZZoMBiE13 says:

    I guess this is the new Assassination move Bungie was talking about. The Stealth-Snipe-Back-Smack-Attack. Powerful stuff.

  25. RightTripleVIC says:

    Red thought that playing other shooters like Gears of War would make him a better Halo player. Turns out he was right.

  26. Gnome says:

    “Unfortunately, Halo Reach decided to borrow a little to much from the movies while making its multiplayer.”

    “Just offscreen: A mirror”

  27. big appleton says:

    I merely have a well polished silver teapot in front of me

  28. SPOC says:

    “All I’m saying is that the Halo Myth Busters need to retest this one!”

  29. H3kl4 says:

    See!! Its easy to be a Halo Matrix League Gaming pro. All you need to do is wait in this living room and try and bend a spoon. With your mind.

  30. Amaterasu says:

    “hey a lollypo-“BAM!!!

    “Wow it really does have a bible code on it…”

  31. Captain Spark says:

    Spartan-013, suffering from a head cold, wipes his nose on his armored sleeve and forgot his finger was still on the trigger.

  32. Araknoros says:

    My hearts Beating, My Hearts Beating, Meh hands are shaking, meh hands are shaking, but IM STILL SHOOTING and Im Still getting them headshots, like BOOM HEADSHOT BOOM HEADSHOT BOOM

    • FinAeros says:

      Oh, Doug.

  33. Dan says:

    “Why can’t I hit anything? I think this sniper is broken….”

  34. Scotty-Bob says:

    When Gears of War meets Call of Duty

  35. Someone says:

    “Finally! After trying so many times, we’ve finally staged the ultimate snipe! You did put are names on it didn’t you?”


  36. Wortwortwort says:

    This is for last weeks : NAAAAAAZGUUUUUUUL!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

  37. Chris101b says:

    “Okay, so to do the new assassination mechanic, all you do is hold B, pull the trigger, and….. OH SHIT!!!!!”

  38. Elitearbiter says:

    SPNKR instructions: ATTENTION Hold like this (with figure holding correct way.) I guess it doesn’t just apply to the rockets.


    BOOM! headshot!

  39. Panncakez says:

    Blue was furious when the latest Halo 3 patch allowed average players to be even more like MLG pros.

  40. Gnome says:

    You may think this was a good shot, but he had three other guys lined up in front of him.

    Someone finally managed to use Angel’s backstabbing skills for good.

  41. retinence says:

    No one shoots like Gaston, makes those beauts like Gaston, then go tromping around wearing boots like Gaston!…

  42. NOKYARD says:

    BWU: Urk confirms the misplaced reticule from the Reach screen shot was not due to a glitch.

  43. Divine Plan says:

    Fanboys. Everybody’s problem.

  44. Hedgemony says:

    After Carl’s third straight suicide attempt failed, Ron decided to give him a pistol to try again.

  45. Mr Viper says:

    If the fall doesn’t kill you, the batshit insane Matrix reject will.

  46. Surrender says:

    I shot by accident. I hear lots of guys have that problem…

  47. Scotty-Bob says:

    Halo Mythbusters: Can the ghost of the Pit really shoot backwards?

  48. Personsen says:

    I think the safety is on…

  49. xLAS3RP01Nt3Rx says:

    You’re doing it wrong.

  50. Zee-V70 says:

    You guys complain about not being able to hit Elites and you’re hitting Spartans behind you? That’s just damn hypocritical.

  51. L337MA573R says:

    “That was all 100% pure skill.”
    (bs will get it)

  52. xxxJL AUDIOxxx says:

    So when Kelly told me she was pregnant, I hit her in the stomach with the butt of my sniper rifle, and wha-la, problem solved! Oh shit, it wasn’t supposed to go off!!

  53. Ny Hitman 0401 says:


  54. EliteXDeath says:

    Noone saw THAT coming. Literally.

  55. Gin says:

    What would have happened if Carmine had been a Spartan in Gears of War.

  56. Roaven says:

    Wait, does this trigger make the g-Oh shit!

  57. Malcis says:

    Got ’em.

  58. the_eNeME says:

    Astro gaming headset FTW!!!

  59. TAS9303 says:

    And i still have no idea what this little switchy thingy does…

  60. Yoman says:

    When Bob discovered that the Halo weapons had little easter egg logos on them, he became paranoid that every weapon had one. he also forgot that the safety should be turned on when pointing a gun near your face.

  61. The Flying Spartan says:

    As a matter of fact yes, I did room with a Jackal in college. Why?

  62. ComaToast says:

    KARATE CHOP! Oh hey, would you look at that, I killed somebody.

  63. Techchild says:

    If your amazed at this, you should see him duck hunting!!

  64. Natonator says:

    Oh hang on, there’s some dust in here… (blows on gun) …ah, there we go, blue guy… blue guy?

  65. VoltRabbit says:

    Whats the red button do?

  66. VoltRabbit says:

    In reference to the old screen shot.

    “I finally got my Epic Mount!!!”

  67. Morpheus300 says:

    Grif – “Nice Shot, Sarge. You bagged another Blue Guy!”
    Mirror, Mirror on the w… One second… *BANG*
    Blue Guy – “That is not physically possible”

  68. Cardo says:

    Blue team is just terrible at the zip-line.

  69. KkilljoyGruntT says:

    Turn the safety on! Turn the safety on!
    Hmm. it says: Safety. What the heck is a safety?
    In one ear and out the other!

  70. BOO!!!


    The stealth camo wore off just as Angel pulled the trigger, effectively ruining Blue’s kill streak for that round.

  71. Rakolai says:

    All of a sudden, having a faulty rifle didn’t seem so bad anymore.

  72. Waffle Deluxe says:

    After defeating the final boss, Link was finally feed up with Navi’s constant pleas for attention.

  73. Cypher says:

    HAH! If you scramble the letters on here, it says WANG!

  74. Desert Rat says:

    “He got a no-scope, no scope was involved!”

  75. Typhoongale says:

    Is it a spider?

  76. deora says:

    “oh man…. where is the night vision button on this thing?”

    perpetually confused about how the scope worked with that odd lens, the red spartain unfourtuanatly forgot about the saftey

  77. soulofaqua says:

    When red and blue try to do Gears of War’s over the shoulder perspective.

  78. DethPwn says:

    Desperately attempting to swat the purple flying dolphins, Schizo Red accidentally saved the day.

    It looks like an awesome no-scope, but it’s actually a failed suicide attempt.

  79. L337MA573R says:

    With the implementation of the assassination mode in Reach, players were forced to find a way to counter it.

  80. tobias grey says:

    And everyone made fun of me when I bought my rearview glasses.

  81. Spade says:

    And I did that without a single drop of rum.

  82. Spade says:

    Mom told me she had eyes in the back of her head to watch me.
    She just never told me that she played Halo too.

  83. halcylon says:

    … wha… What are you talking about? Cheating? Generals don’t cheat…

  84. Nuclear Pi says:

    But you had something the others didn’t have, something nobody saw but me. Can you guess?

  85. Babbott says:

    New cover system = blind headshots

  86. FinAeros says:

    “This doesn’t seem physically possible!”

  87. Janaka says:

    And whats even more impressing is that he assassinated some other dude at the same time.

  88. Morpheus300 says:

    Red Spartan: “Ok, So this is the Magazine, This is the cocking handle and this is the…”
    Red Spartan: “OOPS!”

  89. FTTinc says:

    Blue: Shit dude, that almost hit me!!

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