Friday Caption Fun, Round 76

Halo 3 ScreenshotMythic Brawl, this weekend’s 12 player FFA double EXP playlist, is ridiculously boring so instead of expanding upon that particular playlist, I will instead tell you that root canals suck. I spent yesterday morning getting the anatomical hollows of tooth #19 scraped clean of nerve tissue, blood vessels and various other cellular entities. I don’t recommend it. Playing Halo, and captioning, is much more enjoyable so let’s commence upon the latter activity shall we? Up first is recapping last week’s responses!

  • “My… Precious!” (Panncakez)
  • “‘I need to commandeer your vessel to sector 12, who’s in charge here?’ ‘The grenaaaade, the grenade is our master, the grenade chooses who will stay and who will go.'” (soulofaqua)
  • “The Spartans’ game of hot potato had just gone horribly wrong.” (Pete Cooper)
  • “It’s a ’shop. I can tell from some of the pixels and from… that huge fucking line down the middle.” (the_eNeME)
  • “That’s no moon…” (Seenoht)
  • “How many Spartans does it take to change a …. Wait, that’s not a light bulb!!!” (borrowedchief)
  • “Complaints Section: Please Take a Numbered Pin.” (L337MA573R)
  • “Outnumbered and out of ammo, Omega squad prays for weaponry… Holy Cow, it worked!!!” (ZZoMBiE13)


Now I know what to do every time I find myself frantically saying, “I need a weapon!” I’ll pray. And I hope, for the Guardians’ sake, they deliver me something a bit better than just a grenade. At least give me the plasma version! Somehow I have a feeling the person in the next screenshot did not pray for whatever the heck it is he’s wearing. Who knows though. Maybe you do, in the form of a witty caption hopefully!

Halo 3 Screenshot
Author: FAlLENSoILDEr 2

113 Responses to Friday Caption Fun, Round 76

  1. MOM! everyone DID make fun of me!

    watch for that one, he’s a killer.

    and this is bungie’s new armor you can unlock for Reach.

    • Wasiq says:

      I lol’d at the Mom one :D
      How about:|

      My weena!

      (Bowling for soup reference)

      • Talis=) says:

        The cones back!!! MWAAH AH AH AH AH!!!!

  2. Indeed Not says:

    Come on guys, let’s go rescue Woody!

  3. Dragnew says:

    This is one midget that does NOT want to meet BS Angel.

  4. lskcrcrjvsa says:

    I didn’t know Towelie played Halo!

    • A Shaky Shotgun says:

      “I have no idea what’s going on.”

    • Oneshotfilm says:

      “No, you’re a towel!”

  5. Poopie McGhee says:

    Snake as a spartan…

  6. IcyTreats says:

    This year, little Jimmy dressed up as a REAL killer..the traffic cone.

  7. Spartan-092 gets ready for halloween 2010

    The Snuggie, spartan edition

    • BTW, I wouldn’t recommend the root canal either. Had 2 done…….. at the same time……..

      • bs angel says:

        Omg. How long did it take to get two done in the same appointment?

        • well, it took 3-4 visits, around an hour each visit

        • bs angel says:

          That sounds horrible. I wouldn’t want it stretched out to multiple appointments. I had one 2 1/2 hour appointment and that was bad enough!

      • Aklangi says:

        I have one coming up; scared now..

      • DethPwn says:

        Damnit, I’ve got a root canal coming up :(

  8. Crazeye0 says:

    This Spartan was set on proving that the Spartan in the “Ultimate camo” screenshot, did not have the ultimate camoflauge.

  9. Cardo says:

    Damn, the pharmacist wasn’t kiddin’ … these Magnums are huge.

  10. Cardo says:

    Ill-advised new perk in Reach: Conspicuous Inanimate Object Camo.

  11. fool says:

    Evidence that the recession is affecting everyone, the Spartans can no longer afford all of their armor.

  12. OwlAssassin says:

    Stop smoking. OR A F*CKING CIGARETTE WILL TEAR YOU LIMB FROM LIMB. Thank you for watching this UNSC PSA on public safety.

  13. Black Theorem says:

    The sad Spartan didn’t realize that his Halloween costume looked like the tip of a crayon.

  14. Atlas says:

    Since the Spartan project had just begun and funding was low, the research team had to come up with something little more low tech then they had wanted.

  15. F8L ERROR says:

    Master Chief Halloween costume “Candy Corn”.

  16. Skelbrute says:

    Being the last Spartan in line for costumes, Mr. Security got stuck with going as candy corn this year.

    • Marksman says:

      Missed out on that by 6 minutes. Nawwww.

  17. Somebody got killed by a traffic cone, and got Recon armor. Let’s see what happens when I kill somebody AS a traffic cone!

    • Atlas says:

      Then would you get flaming Re-Cone armor?

      • IcyTreats says:

        not bad, Atlas.

        • Atlas says:

          Why, thank you. I do try.

  18. JLay says:

    Bungie’s new ‘active cone cammo’ proved to be an epic fail.
    ———-
    Hmmm, perhaps Blackout wasn’t the best map to try out a traffic cone disguise.
    ———-
    “We are from France!” (old SNL reference)
    ———-
    After consulting with top fashion houses, the UNSC unveils its new armor made to de-emphasize Dare’s chin.
    ———-
    Hey, I know it gets lonely in the field, but if you don’t quit humping those cones this is what your children will end up looking like!

  19. ReverendTiki says:

    Security SPARTAN, who just got out of cryo, didn’t realize he had missed halloween by a couple months

  20. soulofaqua says:

    Spartans as seen through the eyes of BS Angel.

    Because Size Matters.

  21. SHAGGYDEATH says:

    Mom! I said I wanted to be a Gnome not a Cone!

  22. CurbStomp says:

    Not even the Spartans could escape the failing economy. In need of more funding, Spartan-084 took a job standing on the side of the road for Johnson Construction.

  23. ZZoMBiE13 says:

    Oompa, Loompa, Doompady-Doo,
    I’ve got a Battle, Rifle for you…

  24. Mizzy says:

    “Try to kill me, will they? Those traffic cones won’t know what’s coming to them!”

  25. Monkey_lord says:

    Hysterically the zombie spartan talking to himself: If I stay still the not-Zombies will think I’m part of scenery, and when they get close, they’ll fall for my trap.

  26. ZZoMBiE13 says:

    While I liked Halo “Risk”, this new version of Halo “Sorry” just wasn’t that fun.

  27. ZZoMBiE13 says:

    UNSC budget cuts were apparent when the new “Spartan-IV” model rolled out. For some reason, they lacked the style and grace of the Spartan-II or the Spartan-III.

  28. ZZoMBiE13 says:

    Spartan-77’s gambling problem finally reached its apex when he bet away most of his armor and had to walk home in shame, wearing a giant foam cone.

  29. General Vagueness says:

    This Spartan was tired of being assumed to be a man, so she looked for something to emphasize her girlish figure; unfortunately, this is the best she could find.

  30. Pete Cooper says:

    “Carpet man had had enough! No more ‘Rug Rats’ jokes!”

  31. Terminator182 says:

    This is what happens to Spartans pledging a fraternity.

  32. ComaToast says:

    OH NO IT’S THE GHOST OF BLACKOUT!

  33. Mojo says:

    They’ve redone the Blackout map, and changed the name to Coney Island. Guess what the default armor permutation is?

  34. Iago 462 says:

    It’s Peanut Buttah Jelleh time!

  35. Cleansing Aura says:

    And here’s our next pic from “Bizarre ER”.

    “Haha very funny guys – you got me. Now take it off of me.
    Guys? Where are you going? DON’T LEAVE ME HERE LIKE THIS!”

    A sneak preview of Bungie’s new reality show “You’ve been coned”.

    • IcyTreats says:

      I read that as “You’ve been boned.” lol.

      • bs angel says:

        Hhhmmm. I’d watch both.

  36. Oddsock says:

    After Bungie saw the lethal potential of traffic cones, they decided to see how it worked as defensive technology.

  37. Mr Viper says:

    Super soldier or not, Blue Spartan had to admit his helmet was officially stuck in the shower curtain.

  38. borrowedchief says:

    Dear Bungie, I got all achievements, but i did not get katana. I got a meat stick instead…

  39. tobias grey says:

    When you’re already the most deadly killing machine in the galaxy you have to find creative ways to be scrarier on Halloween.

    Foregoing the traditional Zombie plan this Spartan finally came up with a feasable Cone plan.

  40. StuntDouble2483 says:

    Bungie finally reveals Halo: Reach’s game changing innovation…It’s a stealth game. *sigh*

  41. Uccxxxv says:

    Blue had an almost perfect plan to win “scariest costume” at the annual Halloween party, he however forgot one thing, Dare was invited…

  42. Captain Spark says:

    After an all-nighter at the local pub consuming huge amounts of beer and hot-wings, Spartan-032 found that those traffic cones cover his naked ass quite nicely after he shat is pants.

  43. Chris101b says:

    “Hi kids, I’m the letter “I” and I’m here to discuss the word Igloo.”

  44. Declan C says:

    Tactical Reconnaissance; A key part of training in the next Spartan Program.

    • Skeah says:

      Tactical ReCONEaissance, you mean? ;D

      • Atlas says:

        I dunno why you got thumbs down. That was pretty funny :D

        • Indeed Not says:

          The subtleties of puns go over some people heads. Only the truly masterful can fully appreciate them for their beauty.

        • Atlas says:

          Yeah, but I was talking about Skeah’s comment.

        • Marksman says:

          Yeah, I agree. He had a ;D face, meaning you CAN’T thumbs-down him. It’s against the law of the Interwebz.

  45. Rakolai says:

    Following the war, many Spartans found themselves taking on odd jobs to scrape by, with advertising being a popular choice.

  46. Kamikaze8 says:

    Little do the cone commenters realize that thats the wind sock.

    “So this is what they meant by ‘Family Sized Condoms’…”

  47. Anton P. Nym says:

    SPARTAN Dug-801 did not like the “Cone of Shame”.

    — Steve

  48. retinence says:

    After the Great Cone Rebellion of ’53, the UNSC began operations for spy insertion. Initial testing proved… well… fruitful.

  49. retinence says:

    Children wear a dunce cap. Wizards lose house points. And vampires sparkle. But when Spartans act stupid, they aren’t so lucky.

  50. Lovemuffin says:

    The Traffic Cones have adapted into a new superior enemy, using disguises to get closer to the SPARTANs…..

  51. Leafman says:

    “Today on Wild Kingdom, we try to capture the reclusive and skiddish traffic cone on film”

    Spartan-95 attempts to infiltrate the headquarters of the Cone Mafia.

    The grunts didn’t think the Spartan’s food nipple costume was very funny.

  52. Candy Corn anyone? :)

  53. Surrender says:

    When given the role of Traffic Cone Number Two in the Nativity play, the Spartan realised that there was more than one Traffic Cone present at the birth of Jesus Christ.

  54. Surrender says:

    That’s not Big Foot! He’s wearing a watch!

  55. Personsen says:

    WORST. JOB. EVER!!!

  56. PikminGod says:

    “CONE SMASH!”

  57. Ny Hitman 0401 says:

    Ever since the first cone splatter, people have feared cones… others… appreciate cones…

    New chest plate armor, Cone.

    • Aklangi says:

      When i read that i thought of two cones in the right places

  58. NiTrOuS 343 says:

    When he said he wanted to get blown in the wind, this wasn’t exactly what he had in mind.

  59. Its Fun Time says:

    I do not like the cone of shame…

  60. WT_Snaks says:

    In the land of frolicking Spartans, an angry cone is king.

    Or…..

    *Dunce*

  61. Gi85on says:

    “This was not the kind of silly-cone implant I had in mind!”

    • Marksman says:

      That’s probably one of the ‘win’ comments. Most of these have been puns and Candy-Corn allegations.

  62. GeneralCupcakes says:

    In the late 2500’s the dunce cone was reincarnated into the school system and was remade to make you a “Bigger Dunce”.

  63. Zee-V70 says:

    He’s doing it vertically wrong. The cone’s upside-down and the ice [cream] is BELOW him, after all.

    • Marksman says:

      “Being a dick- Ur doin it rong”

  64. L337MA573R says:

    When our dear friend Ted was offered an opportunity of fulfilling his life-long dream of working for “Cone and Coil of Fusion Storage Inc.”, this wasn’t exactly what he had in mind.

  65. Glasses Guy says:

    Traffic Cones 3: The Hunger.

  66. Lt Anders says:

    Sad was he, for even the cone heads laughed at him.

  67. ALTEX says:

    “What do mean it looks like a traffic cone? That’s not what i was going for at all!”

  68. Dreadhead613 says:

    In a desperate attempt to rack up more kills on X-Box live, little jimmy turns to “special modifications”…..

  69. Aklangi says:

    Through the subspace rift!
    Its the Ark of the Conenant!

  70. StephaBon says:

    The KKK of the 26th century. Supremest against the Covenant of course.

  71. CyanDeadEye says:

    After the traffic cone incident, one spartan tried to use the cone as psychological warfare.

  72. Visitor at home says:

    Cone’d.

  73. Waffle Deluxe says:

    Guys, don’t look at my coner!

  74. halcylon says:

    Doooooes what feel weird?

  75. halcylon says:

    That’s me in the coner… that’s me in the spot light losing my religion.

  76. Marksman says:

    America’s Next Top Spartan, 2552 edition. Catfights and cone-kills abound.

  77. The Flying Spartan says:

    After a debacle involving the vehicular death of 33 marines and one Elite, Spartan-343 was forced to do community service as a road hazard on a license test course.

  78. Babbott says:

    Is that Dan Aykroyd from the movie Coneheads?

    Also for the picture last week, “The holy Hand Grenade” – Monty Python

  79. cardo says:

    Special Timmy is never allowed near water unless he has his man-floatie on.

  80. Irregularly Patterned Pun says:

    The response to the carpenter syndacate’s complaints for poor working enviroments did not consist in any makovers, but in a far cheaper mascotte costume.

  81. CapturetheBomb says:

    “By day he was a lonely and mild-mannered super soldier security guard, by night, he was CONEMAN!!!”
    “Dr. Catherine Halsey tried for years to make Spartan’s armor to be just as deadly as the enemy’s. She succeeded.”
    “Coneman the Barbarian”
    “Bungie’s secret ploy to get more gamers: The Cone Camouflage”

  82. DragonFire5380 says:

    The “cone zombies” in the upcoming survival shooter Left 4 Flood, have the ability to run through storms of flying traffic cones completely unharmed.

  83. Panncakez says:

    Security to onlookers:

    “Hey, the cone is no laughing matter. It once leapt 30 feet in the air. Then it killed Hitler. No lie.”

  84. DethPwn says:

    Bungie tried to cash in on the iconism of the Big Daddy with their own version of the metal monolith. It did not work as planned.

  85. Second-hand combat mechs, courtesy of District 9.

  86. Someone says:

    I don’t think its small

    This ought to keep them off cigarettes

  87. Remember Reach says:

    Seriously, dude, this is taking your obsession with Coneheads way too far.

  88. Mr Mailwop says:

    Hello welcome to Cone-Mart

  89. Pingback: Friday Caption Fun, Round 77 « Hawty McBloggy Invites You to Play

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