Friday Caption Fun, Round 66

halo 3 screenshotThose of you who enjoy nothing more than a good hammering are in for a treat this weekend as the current Halo 3 Double EXP playlist of choice is the always enjoyable Grifball. Before you begin pounding people with that big, hard club of yours though, how about you stick around for some of our traditional Friday captioning? First we can go over last week’s witty responses and then it’s time to show yet another screenshot a good time!

  • “Where do I put the quarter?!” (the Light Show)
  • “Little did he know, all of the Grunts were hiding inside.” (SPOC)
  • “The UNSC takes its trend of naming vehicles after animals a little too far. ” (pittofdoom)
  • “Once players reached Set 5 on Firefight they realised they’d need to find cunning hiding places in order to survive.” (Arby)
  • “To the finish, UNSC-BISCUIT!” (Penguin_Ninjoid)
  • “When the Rookie was talking about a vehicle with pure horsepower, this isn’t what the rest of the squad had in mind…. ” (StealthSpeed3)
  • “You have to give GameStop credit, their pre-order bonuses are definitely imaginative.” (DethPwn)
  • “This wasn’t the first time a squad member had ridden a dirty, horse-faced beast; Buck and Dare used to be an item.” (Tactful)


While the last image showed someone riding an animal (and for the record, I’m referring to the zebra, not Dare!), the following screenshot shows some Spartans on a boat. They seem to be in quite the pickle, the specifics of which I’m leaving for you to determine and hopefully voice in the form of a witty caption. Now have at it!

Author: Wiking Scott
halo 3 screenshot

112 Responses to Friday Caption Fun, Round 66

  1. bs angel says:

    I would like to take bets on how many captions will be a variation of the song, “I’m on a boat!” Opening bids start at $10.

    AND FIRST!!

    • Arby says:

      XD I thought that it looked like something else, much much worse =P

    • Nate says:

      Eva spartan yelled after hitting the wave:
      Damn it! Stop the boat !T-Pain went overboard!!

      • Billdebeast says:

        the only downside of that caption is nobody would stop their boat if t-pain went overboard. :p

    • VoicedWalnut says:

      I bid that there will be 30 I’m on a boat captions with $12

  2. Mikey Rocks says:

    Warning: variation of “im on a boat” sorry

    EVA was excited when teh Reconz told him about the free boat ride for 3, but now found himself dissapointed without T Pain on board.

    • Nate says:

      EVA was tired of T-Pain’s saying “Im on a boat.”

  3. ElusiveEagle says:

    You know you’re in trouble when it takes three people to slide on your rubber…

  4. Arby says:

    Two new Reconers accepted help from mr EVA to help hold the noobs at bay, little did they know he was contemplating on killing them and stealing their armour.

    Jealous of the attention Recon had been getting of late, mr EVA, in an attempt to get attention, mustered all of his originality to come up with a pose, a pose that surely nobody had done before.

    In the Haloverse boats are not confined to water. (Sorry bs =D)

  5. EVA, do you trust me?

  6. Crazy A 64 says:

    “I’M ON A B…” Ah F*ck it!

  7. craniumkid22 says:

    “I knew we should have stopped for directions”

  8. AusQB says:

    “Alright, let’s do this. You guys shou-…oh great, more Recon.”

  9. IcyTreats says:

    ‘Dude, I told you NOT to go up that ramp.’

    EVA promised he’d get the Reconers away from the vicious t-baggers. He just didn’t say how.

  10. pwkwsfi says:

    “This is not what I was thinking when you mentioned ‘motorboat’ and ‘ribbed dinghy.'”

    • SkelBrute says:

      This one has win coming out of it ears!

    • Whitehawk13 says:

      Agreed. If this isn’t one of the chosen ones, I’ll cry…. or someone else will…. maybe.

  11. Pete Cooper says:

    Blue Team’s ride on the log flume took a disastrous turn when they ended up inside a grain store.

  12. JLay says:

    After a rapid assault approach, Recon kills the motor…then instinctively starts teabagging it.

    ——-

    I never thought I’d see the day, in boat with Recon and EVA!

    ——-
    “I’m on a boat in my flippy-floppies,
    Postin’ funny quotes for you, Hawty!”

  13. SPOC says:

    “I think this well may be dry.”

  14. EliteXDeath says:

    “The EVA captain frustrated, desperatly throws his AR against the dumb Recon for steering port instead of starport.”

  15. Jekotia says:

    “Dear physics, please don’t kill us.”

  16. pittofdoom says:

    Blue team takes the “Ship of Fools” approach in an attempt to lure the Reds into a state of overconfidence.

  17. Tactful says:

    Live won’t hurt anymore
    It’s an open smile on a friendly shore.
    It’s XBOX LIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIVE! It’s XBOX LIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIVE! It’s
    LIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIVE!
    It’s the Live Boat-ah! It’s the Xbox Live Boat-ah!

  18. SHAGGYDEATH says:

    The Blue team did their best remake of “Journey to the Center of the Earth”

    Finally! Scientific proof that George Washington was a Blue!

  19. SkelBrute says:

    “You kids shut up back there or I will turn this boat around right now, and take you straight to red base and let them have you!”

    __________________

    “So, do you wonder twins still think using a fusion coil to power our landing boat was such a good idea?” *Reaching for sticky grenade*

    __________________

    “What do you mean you can’t fix it? Isn’t that funny armor you have supposed to give you some kind of special powers?”

    __________________

    “Hey, Big Head! Quit screwing around up there acting like Leo and give us a hand back here!”

  20. Das Kalk says:

    i’m a survivor, i’m not gonna give up, i’m not gonna stop, I’ll keep on survivin!

  21. Whitehawk13 says:

    James Bond for the 26th Century.

    (Crouched Recon): Sarge?
    (EVA): Yes?
    (CR): What happened to the water… and DARE?
    EVA: You saw nothing!

  22. rowboat 000 says:

    You’re gonna need a bigger boat.

  23. Monkey_lord says:

    Rule 27 of The Spartan Life: When using going fishing with friends with explosives, remember to turn off the Cowbell Skull.

    ——-

    How the hell did a minor gust blew us up here? We weigh like a damn ton each!

    ——-

    Uh guys, I’m just stating the obvious, but I think this is not the boat launching ramp.

  24. Mike says:

    Nice navigating columbus… now we’ll never get to india!

  25. One Crazy Idiot says:

    The Spartans thought UNSC stood for United Nations SEALCommand. This is the SEAL armor.

    *starts singing “In the Navy”…

  26. Anton P. Nym says:

    “Paddle harder; I hear ‘Dueling Banjos’!”

    — Steve was scarred deeply by that movie.

    • Anton P. Nym says:

      Or… “Faster! Faster! Faster would be better!” (A tip o’ the helmet to Nathan “Mal” Fillion.)

      — Steve

  27. CrazedOne1988 says:

    So who wants to ride on my dinghy?

  28. Poopie McGhee says:

    We have discovered weightlessness… The applications are limitless, like this example or the spartan Drop Boat… the only problems are the inevitable deaths that come with sinking for spartans…

    • Poopie McGhee says:

      weightlessness and instead say “Awesomeness”

  29. ChestnutFirefly says:

    Innnndddddyyy!

  30. General Vagueness says:

    Got in navy and Titanic comments right before me. Oh well.
    “Near, far, wherever you are, my heart will go on.” I had to learn that song for music class in 5th grade.

    These Spartans hadn’t realized that the 26th-century navy still patrolled Earth’s waters. The Office of Naval Intelligence knew this, but as usual having less field experience, were unfortunately not good with boats.

    Jumping ship (LIKE A BOSS)

  31. Whitehawk13 says:

    They found how to move Zig, but Sierra 117 had already beaten them to Justice.

    • Whitehawk13 says:

      (or is Justice the prophet that Steve is dealing with? :P)

  32. t0rm3n7 says:

    Another of Microsoft’s failed ideas for a Halo Kart game.

  33. HSAR says:

    “And my heart will go on and on….”
    (That’s the Titanic song “My heart will go on”, for those that don’t know)

  34. Mizzy says:

    “Rub a dub dub, three men in a tub, and who do you think they be?”

  35. B Falcon says:

    You promised me that there would be water here!

  36. Morpheus300 says:

    4th Attempt…

    “I told you not to use the grenade but Nooooooooooo…..”

  37. DeltaForam says:

    EVA: WTF, this is not the General Lee and how the hell did you install a “Dixie” horn on this thing

  38. Mr Viper says:

    “They’ll easily man a Tank, Banshee, Pelican or even a Fighter Bomber, but ask a Spartan to operate a dinghy and they’ll crumble under the pressure.”

    “Having specially designated his team blue armor to camouflage them during the sea assault, the EVA leader regretted leaving the job of camouflaging the boat to the Recon Brothers.”

  39. NartFOpc says:

    Split your lungs with blood and thunder,
    When you see the white whale.
    Break your backs and crack your oars, men!
    If you wish to prevail…

    This ivory leg is what propels me,
    Harpoons thrust in the sky.
    Aim directly for his crooked brow,
    And look him straight in the eye!

    White whale – Holy grail!
    White whale – Holy grail!

  40. Zee-V70 says:

    “DUDE, I TOLD YOU WE CAN’T PRACTICE ZERO-GRAVITY BOATING IN THE ELEVATOR SHAFT!”
    “Well, why not?”
    “I–I, uh… IT JUST DOESN’T WORK THAT WAY!”

  41. JLay says:

    Prepare to drop!

    • IcyTreats says:

      Nice. Made me lol.

  42. James says:

    “So… you’re sure this is how you got recon?”

  43. njzy says:

    EVA’s and women first!

  44. MGH1138 says:

    Dude, did you just pop my bra?

  45. RedGrimRune says:

    EVA: ” You guys sure this is how we get Vidmaster: Deja Vu?”

    Recons: “Yeah…sure… *snirk*”

  46. CrazedOne1988 says:

    Man, so much for recreating George Washington crossing the delaware…….

  47. Lt Anders says:

    And thus, Agent Washington Crosses the Valhallan River.
    -bleh, fail.

  48. A Shaky Shotgun says:

    Motorboating: you’re doing it wrong.
    (get you’re minds out of the gutter!!)

  49. Jim 028 says:

    Coming this fall to the Discovery Channel, the Deadliest Catch just got deadlier!

    • pittofdoom says:

      lol, Now with fully automatic weapons! And crabs that blow up when they’re caught.

    • ablestmage says:

      The Deadliest Kitsch, anyway =P

  50. El Bunnyo says:

    “Blue team takes the admiral’s call for “…every last ship” too seriously”
    ______________________________________________________________
    Due to budget cutbacks, ONI’s recon vessels are not what they used to be

  51. the blue shoe says:

    ODSTeam FEMA

  52. Ben Of Bodom UK says:

    Fuck land, I’m on a boat, motherfucker
    Fuck trees, I climb buoys, motherfucker
    I’m on the deck with my boys, motherfucker
    This boat engine make noise, motherfucker

    Sorry XD

  53. Aklangi says:

    Gun it EVA! Right into the hangar!

  54. When the Sarge said to the Drop Ships the Slow Squad got a little confused

    _____________or:

    INCOMING!!!!

    __________and finally:

    I’M KING OF THE WORLD!!!!!!

    • Cyanide & Happiness says:

      On a boat like Leo….
      If you own the show…

  55. The Flying Spartan says:

    Come on! If this worked for Indiana Jones it’ll work for us!

    Holy crap! This boat is so awesome the water disappeared!

    You’re flooding the engine!

  56. Humrh360 says:

    “Don’t look down, guys!”

  57. VoltRabit says:

    Introducing the L33T Sw33T Jumps Clan

  58. VoltRabit says:

    “You have to use the ‘choke’ then pull the start cord, don’t give it too much gas or you’ll flood the engine”

    “When was this turd commission?”

    “1996”

  59. DethPwn says:

    After the news of another hostage taking, the UNSC decided to up their game against the Somalian pirates.

  60. Shurmanator says:

    “General Washington, why the hell did we cross the bloody river at night?”
    “Because it makes for a better painting, now shut up and row.”

    “MARK WHALBERG YOUR BEARD IS AWESOME Oh crap look a storm.”

  61. UnluckyIrish14 says:

    “Uh, guys, I, uh, think we might’ve made a wrong turn at the Albuquerque Canal. We seem to be being followed by a few Reds.”
    “How many?”
    “Enough to ruin the f***ing painting, General Washington.”

    • Shurmanator says:

      Awww. that’s in poor taste.
      You stole my caption.
      But don’t worry, it’s k.

  62. Begocer says:

    Even Spartans drive dinghies as bad as Niko sometimes…

  63. Love Slice says:

    When Blue realized that they were in an isolated area with no covenant to shoot, they were forced to find a new form of entertainment after their karaoke nights began to get repetitive.

  64. StephaBon says:

    how many reconz does it take to get a raft down from a ceiling?………2 and 1/2

  65. L3377MA573R says:

    -“Soooo….where’d you get the idea that a raft was a better idea than a parachute?”

    -“I told you we should have taken the elevator.”

    -When one forger discovered a hidden, removable wall on Longshore, he came face-to-face with the strangest of easter eggs.

    -“You know, I think we missed the freeway exit to the rockets.”

  66. Fushiko says:

    No matter how hard they tried, Blue leader couldn’t stop playing with his dingy.

  67. Fushiko says:

    he tried*

  68. iCeDrAgOn01 says:

    Before Steve could realize and stop it, Recon noobs had infected his dinghy and quite possibly had ruined his retirement trip.

  69. JVictor says:

    “Split your lungs with blood and thunder, when you see the white whale! Break your backs and crack your ores, men, if you wish to prevail!!!”

  70. porge says:

    New gametype included in ODST: see who can find the most 12-year-olds singing “I’m On A Boat” through their mic while you betray them!

    • porge says:

      kind of fail

  71. gunstar2 says:

    “Ship to starboard!”
    “Who is it?”
    “Brutes, sir, and after us!”
    “By gar! Starbucks, frog blast the ventcore–and be quick about it!”

  72. Dust and Echoes says:

    “This boat can’t sink!”

    The UNSC navy isn’t just in space anymore

  73. Dust and Echoes says:

    Ok, I know this isn’t a caption, but I just realized how fucking awesome it would be riding a boat down from orbit. Seriously.

  74. The Real Dr Nog says:

    little did EVA know that when he invented a portable life boat for no more falling damage, bungie had already fixed the problem

  75. Babbott says:

    Blue team tried to reenact Giligan’s Island…

  76. Admiral Madden says:

    “I’m on a (dingy) BOAT!”

  77. Shirdel7221 says:

    Are we there yet?

  78. Crazeye0 says:

    Avast! we be pirates!

  79. “So how did we end up here?, I thought recon was good!”

  80. Pr1v4teChurch says:

    The EVA Spartan Shouted,”GET OFF MY DINGHY!”

  81. xLAS3RP01NT3Rx says:

    Somalian Pirates of the 26th Century!

  82. R2-JL says:

    “We all live on a yellow … rubber dingy”

    “Are we there yet?”

    “So is this thing rated to hold 3 fully armored Spartans?”

    “Great, we finally find a boat and now all the water’s gone.”

  83. Will Pwn 4 Food says:

    “I got my Recon, and my two frags, I’m flag-cappin’ you’re on the ground gettin’ teabagged”

  84. SonofMacPhisto says:

    ‘Wait a second T-Pain, we weren’t supposed to no-scope that mermaid?’

  85. cyanide & happiness says:

    when Noah heard of the flood, he made a boat. that was too small for 2 of everything. so he took two of the most prized possetions on xbox live. 2 recon armours. he got the wrong kind of flood.

  86. Penguin_Ninjoid says:

    Oh noes! Surprize boatsecks!

    • SonofMacPhisto says:

      EVA thought the Recons just wanted to take her out for a nice boat ride. When the video camera came out, she realized she made a VERY big mistake.

  87. tobias grey says:

    So Bungie is finally coming through with the long awaited Pimps at Sea.

  88. Skeah says:

    Blue team quickly realized that “Use in case of flood” had nothing to do with zombie outbreaks at all.

  89. Desert Rat says:

    If the boat doesnt even fricken float, how the hell did it get up here?

  90. Amaterasu says:

    “Full speed ahead”

    or

    ‘Though they had found a great sniping point, they realised none of them had the guns to do so’

    • Amaterasu says:

      +

      “thats the last time I let you two drive”

  91. Ny Hitman 0401 says:

    Shortly after they got in the boat, they released bs angel wasn’t coming… or giving away free handjobs :'(

  92. Gnome says:

    The war was going so badly that they were forced to cross the Deleware to ambush the red army.

    “What do you mean we ran out of gas?”

    “When the captain told us to get to the lifeboats, I sorta pictured something else.”

    Some vehicles were cut from the original build of Halo 3 after they cut the aquatic level, and unfortunately no one ever told these guys.

  93. ablestmage says:

    “BOAT said the lady!”

  94. TheArbiter says:

    “We have the boat…but where’s the water?”
    “I knew forgot something…”

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