Land Grab Is a Form of Territories

the finger

To the hardworking and underappreciated Halo 3 Matchmaking Veto Gods,

I haven’t written to you in a while; as a matter of fact it’s been nine long months since I last deposited a note into your inbox. While I freely admit I am more than a little high maintenance, I do attempt to keep my complaining to a minimum. Lately though as I find myself in the same frustrating situation time and time again, I have watched my patience slowly wane until ultimately being consumed by anger. Thus I am back, again with the same simple request.

First I’d like to say that I recognize your job of choosing a second Halo 3 gametype after the initial selection is vetoed as being quite difficult. I don’t question that and I admire the blood, sweat, and tears you have poured into your work for the past several months. You still seem a little confused about something though so please allow me to make a few comparisons in order to assist in the clearing up of that haze. If you were to offer me a glass of red wine and I declined, your next suggestion would not be a Merlot. If you were to offer me a plate of calamari and I declined, your next suggestion would not be squid. If you were to offer me anal sex and I declined, your next suggestion would not be to stick your dick up my ass so STOP GIVING ME FUCKING LAND GRAB AFTER I VETO TERRITORIES! It’s essentially the same exact gametype, fucking sitting in a tiny ass spot for a torturously long time. If we were dogs that had to piss in order to capture the territories, timewise it would be equivalent to numerous morning pees and satisfactionwise similar to getting your right testicle bitten off by a psycho bitch of an ex-girlfriend.

In summary, I would appreciate you fixing your shit. Thank you much!

40 Responses to Land Grab Is a Form of Territories

  1. Bollocking gruntbags, this happened to me yesturday. What’s the point? Its not a veto if you do the same thing on a different place its just a change of scenery with the same lame squatting to fill a bar…

  2. angel… i <3 you…. =D

    • B1G TOBACC0 says:

      This is make me sound totally noobish, but every time i’ve seen <3 and a name, I thought it meant T-Bag. Think about it.

  3. CrazedOne1988 says:

    you tell ’em

  4. Don A K Bab says:

    There’s nothing like a good rant to clear the rage away…………………….at least for a few minutes anyway.

  5. Mr Viper says:

    Not as bad as it used to be.

    “So you don’t want Team Snipers on Valhalla? In that case, here’s Team Snipers on Construct!”

    • bs angel says:

      I’ve had a similar thing happen before, vetoed sniper/shotties only to get sniper/shotties. Talk about my blood pressure rising!

  6. Zwooosh says:

    Ah yes… that happens a lot these times :(

    Reminds me of Bungie day… EVERY TIME you vetoed, the 2nd game was Multi Flag BR on that foundry map with the lift in the middle… also quite frustrating…

  7. BigCountry1369 says:

    Ummm, I don’t understand the anal sex analogy

    =P

    I would sign this memo

    • triptup says:

      i understand the mental image provided by the suggestion after the vetoed anal sex, but i was hoping for a reference to butt plugs or anal beads :P

  8. JLay says:

    I agree and have a follow up question. How do you feel about vetoing One Bomb and then getting a Nuetral Bomb game? I was pi$$ed…what was the point of the veto!?

    • bs angel says:

      Same concept, definitely. I don’t think that one has happened to me though.

      • HellCat says:

        Yeah but who doesn’t like assault? its great but standing still for 30 seconds really does suck

  9. Leeumm says:

    That made my morning. <3

  10. Kato says:

    “If you were to offer me anal sex and I declined, your next suggestion would not be to stick your dick up my ass.”

    A truer metaphor has never been uttered. Good show. *starts slow clap*

  11. Captain Spark says:

    I wondered how long it would take for you to write about this after the forum night last week.

    • bs angel says:

      Not long enough, LOL!

      • DeepCee says:

        Ah yes…that game on Snowbound does bring back memories.

  12. 2L says:

    the butt sex metaphor doesn’t work, unless you are trying to say that the two game types are IDENTICAL and just have different names. Land grab and territories are different, if only slightly. They both suck monster ass, but they are different. A more apt analogy would be asking for cowgirl sex, getting denied, and then asking for reverse cowgirl, or something like that.

    In any event, I am AMAZED at the lack of ingenuity in Halo matchmaking. If you bust a custom game out w/ your friends there are SO many ways to play: escort, phantoms, shit you’ve never even heard of. Why does matchmaking mostly consist of 4 game types and 8 maps.

    “just play customs” you say. Well, i’m 25 and don’t have many friends that play video games. It’s hard to meet people online that will consistently join a custom game and be cool. So, we matchmake…

  13. TheChrisD says:

    You people still play Halo enough to bitch about it…?

    • Mizzy says:

      You still play Pokemon and not get bored with it…?

    • bs angel says:

      I fully expect to not see your name on any more Forum Night sign-ups from this point forward. ;)

      • Mizzy says:

        What exactly is a forum night signup anyway?

        • bs angel says:

          We have organized (and not organized, LOL) forum festivities on a regular basis. While we meet on various games, H3 is always a favorite of course. There’s a forum link at the top right of the sidebar. Feel free to stop by if you feel so inclined. :)

  14. obsidianchao says:

    They fixed it? Finally. I completely agree.

  15. Im scared…someone hold me.

    • DeepCee says:

      *hugz*

  16. LOL amen! i’m gonna laugh tomorrow when bungie posts a update saying:

    we have improved the second gametype after vetoing. we apologize. is it okay now, angel?

    haha. love it.

  17. DethPwn says:

    I do not trust the veto system. Point blank. I only veto if I HATE the gametype or I’ve played the same map 20 billion frickin’ times in a row. *stares angrily at Guardian*

    • Will Pwn 4 Food says:

      DUALS!

      • DethPwn says:

        Lol

  18. CBD says:

    This is one of the reasons why I stick to LAN, well that and because XBOX Live is run by homophobic douchebags

  19. LAZR Blade 14 says:

    Aw, c’mon, Territories is fun! Am I right, guys?
    …Guys?
    …I’m so lonely.

  20. FluidDarkness says:

    I hope Shiska reads this post, if nothing else. :)

    That said, it does seem like every playlist consists of only 4 maps and 3 (at most) gametypes. I find I have to REALLY like the playlist to stick with it longer than a week or two. It’s a good thing I am a huge fan of the Social Big Team, although Sand Trap rarely ever shows up in that one (I have to play Social Skirmish to get my fix, I think.)

    Some more variety (5-6 maps, 4-5 gametypes) would be nice. Or a playlist that includes ALL maps (I don’t think I have ever seen Cold Storage) for people who want to play at least 4v4. Although if I never see Narrows or Isolation again, I’m totally cool with that. Please don’t tell me to play custom games. I want the experience points since I’m taking the slow route to becoming a higher ranked officer.

    Oh yeah. Down with Team Snipers. The worst gametype ever. I don’t like being forced to play the long range thing through the whole match.

  21. HellCat says:

    I love social skirmish so its my favourite (why have the objective as killing when everyone is busy capturing and planting you kill them) and when territories comes up i cry and everyone says “hey everyone Veto” because everyone doesn’t like territories i thought everyone would veto but most don’t -angryness- and when they do its land grab which is slightly better especially on the Narrows but still i’d rather have one bomb or one flag

    Btw your analogies are intriging… So you don’t want butt sex?

  22. ElusiveEagle says:

    That’s my girl!

  23. tortacular says:

    bs angel prefers grabbing other things in matchmaking.

  24. DTA_MoonDawg says:

    FOR THE LAST TIME, I DONT WANT FUCKING ONE BOMB ON NARROWS.

    *Veto*

    BULLSHIT! ONE FLAG ON NARROWS?! GOD DAMMIT!!!

    • A Deaf Boy says:

      LOL!!!!!!

  25. Gnoizic says:

    Sadly enough, I can attest to the psychobitch ex-girlfriend part. That’s why they call me Lefty :/

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